Weeds

You inhabited my garden with your hand full of seeds,

I let you in, hopeful for roses,

All you planted were weeds.

Spiders on Drugs

And yet another reason to wake up in the morning.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHzdsFiBbFc&eurl=http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.ListAll&friendId=97568&page=4&feature=player_embedded

Pachelbel Canon Rant

Cellists will definitely appreciate this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdxkVQy7QLM&eurl=http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.ListAll&friendId=97568&page=4&feature=player_embedded

The Best of Craigslist

I found this review on Craigslist and LOVED it!

I'm not an experienced motion picture critic, but since I have have more than a passing familiarity with the cast of this stunning production, I feel qualified to discuss the highlights of the film and it's accidental theatrical release. "My Boyfriend's Sex Tape" was an chance discovery. One of those little gems that you stumble on to, have no idea what it might be about, but decide, "What the hell? This might be the video record of Aunt Fran's 60th birthday party that I've been searching for. I'll just check." But, ah, no. The opening montage erased any thoughts of Aunt Fran. Or even any recollection that I have an Aunt Fran. There, on an cinematically sad-looking bed, was sprawled his ex-girlfriend, in all her pasty-white, split-ended, two-inches-of-roots-on-her-already-atrocious-dye-job comeliness. She giggled. She looked demure. She raised her eyes in wonder and a bit of fear, as though it were her first time. What an amazing actress! To convey such wide-eyed virginity when one and all are aware that she is probably the biggest slut known to mankind. At this point I became aware of the music. May I commend the director, my boyfriend, on his unexpected choice of what seemed to be early '90s euro-pop. You might think, "A sex tape? But of course the background would be Barry White! Or perhaps the soulful stylings of some other R&B legend. Or maybe even Aerosmith." But no. I'm quite certain that the background music originated in Eastern Europe, right around the time that Banarama finally made it over there. And then! Then leading man's entrance....what can I say? Was I more bowled over by the fact that my boyfriend had a huge zit on his ass, or by the fact that judging by tan, haircut and approximate fat/muscle ratio this film was made in the not-to-distant past.

Fuck you, asshole. Next time, erase the goddamn thing, hide it (really, really well), or just be a man and tell me the truth.

The Bret Michaels Weave

Bret Michaels + synthetic hair weave = Fucking Amazing

"combined of my [natural] hair and the finest extensions Europe has to offer. I do the show without [the bandanna] on all the time and they won't film me. They are like, 'Put your bandanna back on. It is your image.' It is my signature thing." - Bret Michaels

This motha fucka lost his mind when he lost his hair.

Gay TV

I found the San Francisco Gay Channel. I am in awe. God bless San Francisco and the Castro.

St. Patrick's Day

I should be drunk on green beer and car bombs. I should be jumping off three story buildings. I should be anonymously making out. I should be alot of thing but instead I am on my couch on my blog. I had my beer. I wore my green. My liver is spared for the day. Everyone seems to be outside having a St. Paddy's smoke sesh... Damn, I want a cigarette.

Addiction

I have a new addiction. It's kind of twisted. I was trying too figure out the difference in pills that ended up mixed together in containers and where better than google, right? Right. There is this whole diaboloical operation of drug connesieurs on the internet. Any pill, any combination... it's on there. It makes Erowid look weak. Anyways after distinguishing the difference in ambien and xanax I took to a little scheming of my own. These sites are amazing. As for my new addiction... Mothers who find pills in their kids backpaks, pockets, drawers.... They're all on there. All the little stories and ingenious parenting techniques. I find it fascinating. And this is coming from someone whose mother knows pretty much everything I've done... well a superficial skim I should say. But check it out sometime. It's really a faschinating read.

Dear Participants

Today is day one. This is my coffee-induced idea that I am forcing upon myself. I have to make myself write every day whether I am a lazy sonofabitch or not. This is for blogging only. My musings and poetry are all on my other blog... which is much more personal and makes me feel naked. Really freaking naked...


...So welcome and feel free to comment as you wish.